Humour
Posted by dulwichmum on Thu 11 September 2008
I am sad to say that not everyone gets my sense of humor (sigh).
I popped into Sloane Square last Saturday afternoon, in search of the ideal birthday gift for my darling mother. I naturally ignored her hints as she actually wanted me to provide her with a case of Blue Nun (OHMYGOD)! Instead I purchased her a sweet cashmere twin set from Peter Jones. When I tottered up the Kings Road in search of appropriate wrapping and a greetings card, I found a super little stationers and when I saw this card, I feared I would die laughing!
I presented Brenda with the card this evening, and she didn’t seem to realize that it was meant to be humorous! “I am delighted to see that you are taking your faith more seriously,” she said. “Are you praying for a conversion for James?”
Oh dear…
I am afraid that I may have given my mother the wrong impression, since I started wearing my pretty new Santitos bracelet. It has fire polished smoke topaz and jet beads and a traditional looking medal with an image of St Expedite attached. Brenda was clearly very impressed. But the reason I adore this bracelet is the uncertainty regarding the actual existence of this saint… The story goes that he may have been inadvertently invented by a group of nuns. In 1781, a packing case containing the body of a saint who’d been buried in the Denfert-Rochereau catacombs of Paris was sent to a community of nuns in the city. Those who sent the body wrote “Expedite” on the case, to ensure fast delivery of the corpse for the obvious reasons. The nuns got confused, assumed Expedite was the name of a martyr, prayed to him, had a bunch of prayers answered amazingly quickly and the cult of St. Expedite was born.
I couldn’t resist the trinket when I read about it. It looks just as pretty as my mothers various First Class relics, but it doesn’t claim to contain any fragments of the true cross, bone, hair or blood flakes. Brenda is a fundamentalist Roman Catholic (you think I am joking now, don’t you)!
I don’t want to be a saint if they are going to feed my corpse through a shredder and use it to make medals for middle aged ladies to hang around their necks. It sounds like much more fun in hell.
Anyone for gin?
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Kitschen Pink said,
Honey, you’re blogging saint facts – there’s a catholic in you somewhere!
Daddy Papersurfer said,
There are an awful lot of cases in this post and nuns to boot …….. makes me feel kinda blue ……..
Oooooo ……….. I’ve had an idea …….. whoops, no I haven’t …….. sorry.
A gin? …. oh go on then just a small one …… have you got Bombay Sapphire? – it seems appropriate – and ice and a slice – ta
dulwichmum said,
Dear Kitchen Pink,
Do you think I am in fact in denial about my devotion?
Perfect Daddy,
I have everything in this drinks cabinet, would you like a glass or do you prefer to drink straight from the bottle?
DM x
Daddy Papersurfer said,
From your slipper young man ……. or do you wear mules?
Gill said,
actually I am with your mother on this one………..I don’t get it either?
sorry,
Gill
dulwichmum said,
Darling Daddy,
You are such a charmer – please use my working boots… er… my Jimmy Choot bootlets!
Sweet Gill,
I thought the card was hilarious, and I find the Saints (false Gods) quite enteraining too! My mother makes Ian Paisley look like Mr Blobby. She believes that there is no salvation in any other Church and certainly no salvation ever for the British – which is a shame because she lives up the road!
Mom/Mum said,
I wonder if my MIL would find that card funny, her being church warden at her local cross of choice? I find it absolute-ly-frickin-hilarious
but then, you did open that gin rather early DM. ..Tsk.
Adventure Mother said,
You can also get T-Shirts with the same slogan as the card, maybe a lttle tacky for you tho’ Dulwich Mum!
valley girl said,
What a versatile card – one that can be used as a joke or for seriously religious ma-in-laws! I must get a stash in….
Saz said,
l’m always up for a gin.!
…and yes l do ‘get’ your humour….love the card…
and l belive your saintly story, as l am a former convent school girl…
nuff said..LOL
dulwichmum said,
Oh Mum/Mom dear heart,
I should have stuck to the Chablis – pass your glass..
Sweet Adventure Mother
Please do post me the link – just in case one of my builders would like one?
Lovely Valley Girl,
You are so right. I shall have James purchase the company!
Sweet Saz,
A sister!
EffieMcB said,
Lovely DM, that card is wonderful. I love the extremely northern European rendition of Jesus (more accurately known as Yeshua Ben Joseph). No one objects to that, only to the gently funny punchline. As a C of E-raised agnostic I find the whole Roman Catholic thing puzzling, but no more so than any other organised religion. I’m sure the gin helps. Will you slip another ice cube into mine?
Hadriana said,
Do you mean Brenda is one of the “Opus Dei”? (Oops. Did I just say that? Naughty me!) I’m C of E but went to a Catholic school and lived in Egypt…so there’s a good old mix of religions blended in the icon/hubbly bubbly! Know what you mean about humour…most people just think I’m away with the fairies (that passes for religion around here!)
Milla said,
Actually I reckon Jesus looks a tad tired – maybe stressed from working out how to pop that red thing on in a manner which won’t droop off a shoulder, ping out of a belt. So many things to go wrong in an outfit. Looks like He needs a little lie down. But don’t we all.
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