Tuesday, May 22, 2012

title pic Mothering Sunday

Posted by dulwichmum on Sun 18 March 2007

You would think that this day – dedicated to and celebrating mothers would make me feel good. Instead, it is simply another opportunity for me to agonise over my shortcomings and inadequacies. No doubt, up and down the land mothers are celebrating their motherhood, gloating regarding the joys of parenthood and generally admiring their adoring offspring.

James spent most of last week telling me how today has been ‘conjured up’ by card manufacturers and florists, in a cynical attempt to improve flagging post Christmas sales figures.

This morning I was woken by my darling gentle Max in his Spiderman pyjamas, presenting me with a hand made card and a wilting daffodil. I must admit I shed an emotional tear – the first of many today. When Freya woke up she immediately caused mayhem as the shop bought card from James had already been written. She engaged in fisticuffs with Max as she been told she could write it – not he, and now she wanted to wear the badge that came with it too.

Freya won, she has been wearing the badge ‘Number one Mum’ all day, even before I received the card. My little girl can scream with the intensity of a pained whippet, the sash windows were shaking in their frames.

I sat at the breakfast table this morning, with my head in my hands – anticipating an entire episode of Trisha dedicated to my shortcomings. I love James with a great passion. He is the love of my life. On days like today I stay with him despite the children, certainly not because of them.

James presented me with a wonderful new Mulberry Emmy hand bag in that trendy lemon coloured Darwin leather this morning.

“Home spun cards are all very lovely and sentimental”, I assured him during the week, “but where is a girl supposed to keep her purse and Blackberry?

James appeared indifferent, worn down by my nagging as he handed it over. I shall never use that bag now.

God I’m superficial. I know he is disgusted with me too.

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