Wednesday, May 23, 2012

title pic So damn helpfull…

Posted by dulwichmum on Sun 18 April 2010

My mother has decided to forgive me for turning my back on the Catholic Church – I think. Brenda invited me to meet her yesterday for a “chappacino” and spent at least 45 minutes describing how life in Beckenham has lost its lustre – she wants to move to Dulwich, “to have a closer relationship” with the poppets…

“Even my chameleons are not blooming as they once did” she sighed.

“Well mother,” I explained, “there is nothing suitable on the market in Dulwich, nothing at all. But I could mail drop the neighbours. I hear that someone has passed away recently…”

I always like to help my mother when I can; she is a widow after all. The housekeeper is delivering these leaflets as I type.

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Comments: 7 Comments to Read

  • Jadzia said,

    Honestly, is that meant to be funny?

    Oh I am so sorry, I am such a hormonal old cow. Sometimes I just can’t control my evil tongue. In reality, I need an enormous kick up the backside. Or a shag, I could do with a shag, but then I have such a huge and wobbly arse, no-one fancies me.

    Please excuse me while I go to my GP and ask for some HRT.

  • Potty Mummy said,

    Well, I like it. But then I live in Russia, so what would I know? (Anyway, what I had meant to say DM was that your leaflet is short, sweet, and to the point – as ever!)

  • Nappy Valley Housewife said,

    Reading the obituaries is the best way to get an apartment in Manhattan. So maybe it could work here too . . .

  • Froginthefield said,

    I’m with Potty Mummy ( as always because she’s taller than me).
    Nappy Valley has a good point, not sure where Jadzia is coming from though……….

  • dulwichmum said,

    Dear Jadzia,

    I hope that you feel better soon. It doesn’t sound as though you are in a very happy place. Have you tried Paul McKenna?

    Thanks darling Potty Mummy,

    Mwah,

    Perfect Nappy Valley Housewife,

    I heard that too!

    Lovely Frogaroo,

    I think that Jadzia is probably simply annoyed that all of the Boden “fun” skirts are sold out in every size over 16 for this season. I hope she feels better soon.

  • Jadzia said,

    Dulwichmum,

    I noticed in your childish edit of my original comment. I am very bored and need either to get a life or to seek psychiatric help.

  • Dulwich Divorcee said,

    I am simply amazed that your mother ever considered life in Beckenham lustrous! Thank goodness she has seen sense and is coming over from the Dark Side.

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