Too Much Too Young
Posted by dulwichmum on Sun 18 October 2009
I am not prudish (stomps foot)… I am always on trend, and a la mode! My radio as likely to be tuned to Radio 1 as Radio 4 (sigh).
My progeny are still so young, I intend to understand their discussions, debates and terms of reference as they grow up and discover the joys of music and popular culture (wipes tear from eye).
Sweet Freya adored singing along to Lily Allen on Radio 1. Lily’s fresh, angelic voice, her simply crafted ballads seemed so very sweet and childlike. Before our holiday last summer I downloaded her latest Album for the car. I almost inhaled my own teeth when I realised that the lyrics on this recording were not censored as they had so obviously been on the radio… My tiny poppets were singing about “sleeping in the wet patch in the middle of the bed” before I even noticed what was going on (wail).
One particular ditty, which I understood to be called “Thank you”, was actually called “F*** You”!!! I quickly flicked on the radio, back to our usual station and then heard tiny Max singing along the words of The Kings of Leon – “Your socks are on fire”…OHMYGOD!!!
Shame on that trollop Lilly Allen and her graceless, vulgar, unrefined compositions. Why are The Kings of Leon singing a song about Thrush? Whatever happened to love songs?
These obscene and sexually explicit songs and lyrics are an assault on the innocence of our tiny children. I refuse to allow them in our home or luxury vehicle again (clutches chest).
The poppets and I have now discovered the joys of Bollywood. Fresh faced young girls, bound about in pretty jewel coloured silks and satins, innocent dance routines and relationships where no-one so much as kisses and all of the men dress like members of The Village People (smirk)!
Bollywood is all so very clean and pure. We do not understand the lyrics of songs or the conversations, not a word! They could be singing about gimp masks or Colombian marching powder for all we care, and there is the added bonus of the dialogue being subtitled! My babies are learning to read so very quickly as a result (smirk).
This weekend, we are off to Tooting to buy some goodies and celebrate Diwali. Max would like some henna designs on his arms like tattoos and Freya wants me to buy her some bindi dots and an exotic outfit so that she can dress like her idol Ashwarya Rai! We have now seen so many of her lovely films, not a naked body or inappropriate relationship in sight!
We are having the most tremendous fun, practicing some super dance routines! It is all such innocent, glamorous fun.
I adored watching old 1960’s films with Doris Day when I was a girl, and we all know that Rock Hudson would never have laid an inappropriate hand on a lady… So if you are almost ploughed over by an Audi Q7, vibrating with the sounds of Bollywood this weekend in South East London, be sure to give me a wave, I am just getting down with my kids!
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Chic Mama said,
I agree, although I love the songs myself they’re totally unsuitable to listen to in front of the children. I have been singing along to a song in the car before with someone else’s child then realised in horror the words….ooops.
Have to admit it’s not teaching our children respect, dread to think what the future holds.
My lovely Q7 is gone…..I’m now driving a new but cheap bus….sob sob
dulwichmum said,
Darling friend,
Hold your chin high, your next vehicle will be an Aston Martin DB9 – not a family friendly vehicle (I hope you kicked the cad in the shins for the loss of your vehicle…). Mwah x
Nunhead Mum of One said,
Darling, we did wonder. I admired your hand movements but David was a tidge concerned that you were directing traffic from the safety of your vehicle.
dulwichmum said,
Sweet NMoO!
But did you check out my super bindi dot?
kitschen pink said,
Are we not to see a video of you en famille doing your Bollywood thang? t.x
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